Episode Title: iDream of Gilligan

INT. SHAY APARTMENT – NIGHT

ROBERT lounges on the couch in pajama pants and a tattered hoodie, surrounded by empty snack wrappers and a very questionable expired can of spaghetti he just finished eating. On the TV? A Gilligan’s Island rerun playing in all its grainy, black-and-white glory.

TV ANNOUNCER (O.S.)
...and now, back to Gilligan’s Island, where nothing ever makes sense and everyone has too much luggage for a three-hour tour!

Robert yawns, burps once (not proudly), and slumps sideways on the couch, eyes fluttering closed.


DREAM SEQUENCE – EXT. TROPICAL ISLAND – DAY

Cue bongo drums. A title card appears in big, retro letters:

“Gilligan’s Island... But It’s Also iCarly and There Are Dancers”

ROBERT is now in full SKIPPER gear—navy shirt, cap, paunchy belly thanks to a pillow shoved under his shirt. He’s standing next to a bamboo hut, hands on his hips.

ROBERT (as Skipper)
Little Buddy! Where’d you go this time?! If you got stuck in a coconut again, I’m making you sleep in the lagoon!

SPENCER (as Gilligan)
POPS UP FROM A PALM TREE TOP
Don’t worry, Skipper! I was just trying to build a zipline out of vines and positive energy!

ROBERT
Gilligan! That’s the third time this week you’ve invented jungle whiplash!


THE REST OF THE CAST IN DREAM ROLES

  • CARLY is Mary Ann, holding a coconut pie and looking way too cheery about everything.

  • SAM is Ginger, dramatically applying lip gloss and somehow already tanned.

  • FREDDIE is The Professor, wearing goggles and trying to convert a bunch of seaweed into Wi-Fi.

  • GIBBY is... the boat.

Yes. Literally. He’s painted like a boat and makes “vroom” noises.


INTERRUPTION: THE HARLEM SHAKE TROTTERS ARRIVE

A bamboo raft crashes onto shore. Off step a wild group in neon-colored outfits doing the Harlem Shake on a loop. They don’t speak. They just shake. Constantly.

SAM (as Ginger)
Are those… the Harlem Globetrotters?

FREDDIE (as Professor)
No. Worse. They’re the Harlem Shake Trotters. They don’t play basketball. They just… do this.

The group shimmies violently, sending coconuts flying. One hits Robert in the head. Coconuts rain from the sky like confetti from a confusing halftime show.

ROBERT (as Skipper)
We’re gonna die here, aren’t we?

SPENCER (as Gilligan)
We’ve got pie and people who never stop dancing! This is paradise!


INT. SHAY APARTMENT – MORNING – ROBERT WAKES UP

Robert jolts awake on the couch, hair messed up, pillow stuck to his face.

ROBERT
Oh man. That was horrifying. Harlem Shaking... forever. Thank God it was just a dream—

SPENCER (O.S.)
Hey, Skipper! I fixed the raft using nothing but licorice rope and vibes!

Robert turns. Spencer is still dressed as Gilligan. Holding a fake oar. Smiling too wide.

ROBERT (screams)
NO! NOOOO! GET BACK, YOU COCONUT DEMON!


SMASH CUT – ROBERT WAKES UP AGAIN

Back on the couch. For real this time. Hair matted. TV off. Can of expired spaghetti still open on the table. He breathes heavily. Looks around.

ROBERT
Oh my God… that was like some stupid ChatGPT fanfiction.

He lies back, covers his face with the pillow, and sighs deeply as we fade to black.


CLOSING CREDITS ROLL
Over a black-and-white clip of Spencer still dancing in a hula skirt next to the Harlem Shake Trotters, who now have Gibby painted like a jet ski.


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Episode Title: iControl Myself

Episode Title: iLove You, But I Also Want the Phone

Episode Title: iStranger Stuff